Failure or Success

Okay, so my new found desire of creative cooking led to a failure one evening. You see, I'd rather not try a new recipe with anyone other than my family - but a good friend was over for dinner and I thought I'd try one anyhow. I believed she would not humiliate me if it was a flop.

"Panini with Brie Cheese, Basil and Chocolate." Yes, you read that line correctly. A recipe that got a ton of rave reviews... a chocolate and cheese grilled sandwich (panini) that included basil. Sound strange, huh? I asked my friend if she was up to the challenge of trying something so odd and she didn't shy away from the opportunity (probably because she knows Roma's Pizza is walking distance from my kitchen.)

As I assembled the panini I kept thinking "this is so weird!" I bet my friend was thinking the same thing - but she kept a bright and happy smile on her face so that her real thoughts would not show through. I placed the sandwiches on the grill and waited for them to become all toasty brown and melty. Finally, the anticipated moment arrived - we sat down to try this confusing combination. "Okay, here we go. Are you ready?"... "As ready as I'll ever be." CRUNCH-ooooze... Chocolaty ~ cheesy ~ basily. A few wordless moments went by as we both attempted to assess the combination of flavors and then decide whether or not we liked it.

The verdict was in. The jury has concluded: That is one STRANGE sandwich. It wasn't horrible. But it wasn't good, either. We finished them up though. Would I make it again? Not so sure... The saving grace was a big of Frito's corn chips. We peeled open the gooey thing and heavily layered the Frito's between the bread slices. That made them a tad better.

Shockingly, we didn't call Roma's Pizza that night.

In that moment, the moment when the brie, basil and chocolate danced across my taste buds, a thought passed through my mind, "You can not cook, woman! What are you thinking?"

It's easy to have our creativity squashed like a bug (oh, bad visual after eating that panini...) I felt like I failed. Part of me wanted to give up on cooking and go back to my non-cooking life - a life where creative failure never happened, at least, not in the kitchen. Then I made myself realize that I didn't fail. The recipe failed me. It just wasn't a combination I liked.

Every creative effort does not end in brilliant success. Creativity is not the final product - it's the journey getting to that final product. And in that creative journey of building the strangest sandwich that's ever crossed my lips, my friend and I experienced real community as we chatted about life, laughed at one another and tried something new...A panini we'll probably never eat again.

That is creative success...

grace & peace on the journey ~ deAnn

(And yes, I'm still cooking up a storm, creating new takes on recipes...some good and some pretty terrible. But I'm having fun and stretching my creative culinary skills! Any other budding chef's out there? Interested in sharing recipes and cooking for a good cause? Email me at droe@lwccyork.com).